SAHHM - Stay At Home Homeschooling Mom

I have tried this before.  Being home, I mean.  When my youngest son was born in 2005, I took a year off from being a pediatric occupational therapist.  At that time Nathan, my oldest, was almost 4 years old and had not started school yet.  You would think that I would have loved it.  Being a mom full time.  I didn't.  I missed working.  So, I went back.  Fast forward to fall of 2009.  Nathan was in second grade at one of the best elementary schools in our county.  He had been deemed gifted and was easily excelling in school, but he as unhappy.  After several weeks of discussion with my husband Mark, and Nathan, we concluded to try homeschooling.  My best friend homeschools her children, and her children were (and still are) doing very well.  It may just be the solution we were looking for, for Nathan.  It was to be a temporary fix for his mental health, knowing that he could go back when he felt ready.  It became obvious that homeschooling was the perfect for Nathan.  He was thriving on an educational level, and so much happier!  Now it is 2012.  Nathan has been homeschooling ever since.  He is in the 4th grade.  Before now, Mark and I shared the responsibility of teaching.  Since Mark works from home, he was able to do some of the teaching while I worked part time as a therapist.  The 2011-2012 school year brought a new challenge though.  Trevor was ready to start school.  Starting from scratch with a child takes intensive one-on-one interaction until independent reading an writing is achieved.  Our previous scenario of shared teaching between Mark an I was no longer going to work.  Mark was not able to spend that much time away from his work.  We decided that I should stay home.  Here I am.  Home.  I have a new title:  SAHHM.  I am so proud of that title, yet I am afraid of the feelings it brings. A feeling of being unsettled, or out of balance.  It is time to find a new balance.  A new Yin for the Yang in my life.